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"What gender is Cooking Mama?"
— W

Currency questions
  • W: I only have 625 florins. I mean euros.
  • S: I like how you're still in ACII mode. I don't even know what the currency in the first AC is.
  • W: Masyaf dollars?

"Living the sad life."
— WC

  • W: S, do you have to go-p?
  • S: maybe I have to go-p... on your face.
  • W: you turned my blissie into a bluhoo, you ham-meanie.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
  • AC: What should I be for Halloween?
  • WC: Justin Bieber.

"Your eyes are the size of the moon”. Is that really a compliment? Think about it. Okay, goodnight!"
— WC

The sausage game: where every question must be answered with "sausage"
  • A: What does yo momma look like?
  • W: Sausage.

  • W: my napkin has fallen off my lap three times in the past ten minutes.
  • S: your lap's too small. Grow your lap.

My siblings on the hoover dam

A: the hoover dam? Was that made by beavers?
S: OH MY GOD. It’s giant. It’s a man made dam!
A: you said “dam”, right? Beavers make dams!

W: did you say “hoover dam”?
S: yes.
W: that’s the only dam I know!


Seeing Altair at age 82
  • S: Holy fuck Altair is old.
  • W: Go kill the captains.
  • S: Okay. Wait. Why can't I climb?
  • W: ... HE'S OLD

Making fun of my siblings

whatshouldwecallme:

When it’s me: 

When it’s someone else:


"I’m going to invent a playground that plays itself."
— W

  • S: HEY GUESS WHAT
  • A: Wha--
  • S: ZUKO'S ALIVE!
  • A: Wait, are you sur--
  • S: The website says he gave the throne to his daughter three years ago and that he's travelling the world and bringing peace with him wherever he goes.
  • A: Oh, wow--
  • S: KBYE (runs away)
  • A:
  • W:
  • S: GUESS WHAT
  • W: You got me a--
  • S: ZUKO'S ALIVE!
  • W: Oh, wow--
  • S: HE'S ALIVE I'M SO HAPPYYY

Trying to explain pregnancy to children
  • S: She would sing off-key as I was trying to sleep. I wanted to punch her in the uterus.
  • W: What's a uterus?
  • A: You know how people say babies are in your stomach? They actually grow in your uterus.
  • W: Oh.
  • S: If you think about it, babies can't grow in your stomach. Where would your food go?
  • A: It's an acidic environment. The baby would be a mutant.
  • S: Or die.

"No one will sponsor me. My own sister. My own mother. My own other sister."
— W